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Christi Diggs
on May 23 2013 - 06:00 AM
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Now, what do you say to that? Other than an emphatic “shhhhhh,” because the woman in question is right in front of you. Or what do you do when another woman walks by and she’s about to spill out of a dress and your son looks at you with his eyebrows raised and acts like he’s about to turn and follow?
Ah, yes, the joys of a 12-year-old in summer where the fashion apparently is skin, and showing a whole lot of it.
During our trip to the zoo last weekend let’s just say we saw a little more than we bargained for. In a few instances, a whole lot more.
At times, we felt like we had taken our 12-year-old to a peep show. Short shorts. Low cut halters. And clothes meant to cover the body, just not quite cutting it.
The first woman sent us all over the edge - well, except the toddler who only saw the slushee in front of him.
She was pushing a stroller, two other kids in tow as well as her husband. A nice family outing on a very warm day.
My husband and I saw them at the same time and looked at one another with wide eyes and a slight smiles. Her shorts were so short that a half inch of her backside -- on each side - was fully exposed. When she walked it was a teeter-totter of more exposed skin.
She had to have felt the breeze on that skin. And what about the husband, wasn’t he seeing that half of her underside was hanging out.
My husband and I had bigger worries. We knew it was only a matter of time before oldest son saw it. Luckily he was oblivious for a while, too focused on his own slushee and the animals. That and we kept trying to maneuver our group away of the exposed posterior (I swear the shorts were getting shorter in the sun.)
But then, we ended up right in back of them again and son looked down to one of the kids who was squealing about a sheep he could pet. Oldest got a good look.
And within second he was cupping his mouth up to my ear and whispered too loudly: “Those are weird shorts.”
I got by with a “yeah they are.” Until he whispered even louder: “Mom, I don’t think she’s wearing underwear.”
Now I’m just sure the woman heard. Or at the very least her husband.
But, well, the kid’s got a point. The husband in question was so nice and opened the door of two exhibits for our family. I smiled wide, but wanted to say, “The shorts. The shorts.”
I mean, hadn’t they noticed the wide eyes of 12 to … well 12 and up boys all throughout the zoo?
We finally moved on ahead of the exposed hemispheres only to be bombarded by the skin tight halters and I swear we even saw a tube top.
I guess I’m just not hip. Or I’m definitely not brave enough to let it all hang out, even if some magazine tells me that’s the style.
I’m more worried about the summer long R-rated movie I’ll apparently be taking my son on.
Oh man, do I ever agree! Hey, I say if you're going to wander around with things hanging out, expect to hear people whispering too-loudly about how you look. What I hate are the water parks. Too many people in teeny tiny bikinis who don't belong in them and way too many pierced bellybuttons in bellies that should NOT be bared! Urp.I agree! Your son may ogle the barely-clad women, but my daughter seems to want to BE one of those women. At 7. She loves to have skin showing. It's so unnerving! Please, please, please may she not end up being the short-shorts mom at the zoo!!!!
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