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Lindsay Metcalf
on Jun 19 2013 - 06:00 AM
My top five most important moments of the summer so far
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mara williams
on Jun 18 2013 - 06:00 AM
Hey, manchild, mama says: clean your room, wash the dishes, don't drink and drive.
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Emily Parnell
on Jun 16 2013 - 06:00 AM
Eating fresh, local produce is good for body and soul
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Jim Cosgrove
on Jun 13 2013 - 06:00 AM
I just want to buy some pants. Please, turn down the music.
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Unfortunately I’ve had to say this to our youngest in the past few weeks. And my husband has had to say something similar. Grandma, too.
Seems our little first-grader has taken to the less formal. No need to call me mom. Nope, somehow to him, I’m just Laura. No more Daddy either, at times. Just Jeff.
He doesn’t do it all time. Just intermittently.
“Can you tell Jeff I’m ready to read?” he asked me one night over the holiday break.
I interrupted. “You mean, Daddy.”
“No,” he said, matter of fact. “His name is Jeff.”
We’ve seen it coming for a few weeks. It started one day after oldest needed some help. Now, to him, husband, his stepdad, has always been Jeff. Well, when he was little, he called him Jeffie, but the teenager in him kind of out grew that.
And like he tends to do, youngest likes to copy oldest. Brother likes Pokemon, so, he does, too. Oldest likes to draw, and now so does his little brother. Oldest doesn’t like to clean his room… you get the idea.
So when daddy became Jeff, we figured it was much of the same.
Then I became Laura.
“Laura, can we go to McDonald’s?” he asked.
And over break, even Grandma became a target.
“Let’s go play in the basement, Susan,” youngest said, prompting Grandma’s eyes to get twice their size.
“What did you call me?” she said, playing along and acting dumbfounded. But you could tell she was a little hurt.
“Susan,” he told her. “That’s your name.”
He was on a roll. He started dropping the Aunt and Uncle titles that once accompanied Kristi, Jennifer, Jamie and Murry.
My sister never really got the “Aunt” included in her name. Ever since he could say Traci, he just always called her “My Traci.” Now that, we thought was cute. It was, “My Traci is coming to see me.” Or, “I talked to My Traci last night.”
But now just calling everyone by their first name? Not cute. Not acceptable.
Husband has had the “respect” talk with him. Explained to him that we are Mom and Dad, and our relationship with him is different than the ones we have with people who call us Laura and Jeff.
You can tell he wasn’t getting it. Still not convinced.
Oldest never went through this phase. Not really sure I’ve ever heard him say my first name, unless someone happened to ask him his mom’s name is. He calls people Aunt and Uncle who aren’t actually blood relatives.
Youngest definitely keeps us on our toes. Has us always asking people for advice. Googling all the time. Checking out parenting books.
Something in husband’s “respect” talk seemed to work. For nearly a week, we heard only Mom and Dad. It was as if he had forgotten our first names.
Must admit, we were feeling pretty good about ourselves. Nipped another bad habit, we thought.
Until last night.
“Is Jeff going to help me with my game?” he asked me.
Nope, I told him.
“But maybe Dad will,” I said, waiting to see his response.
He waited. Sighed loudly, as if he was giving in with frustration.
“Fine,” he said. “Is Dad going to help me with my game?”
As you can see, we got a little more work ahead of us. But I gotta say, at least he has us on our toes. Keeps us fresh and young, right?
This seems to be more common than not. Of course he'll feel more grown up if he uses the names the adults use, right? He's a smart kid. He'll grow out of it. Plus, you know he'll have your names in an emergency. I wouldn't make a big deal of it. I think your response at the end was great!My kids both use our first names on occasion, and even with their grandparents sometimes. You can see they're trying to make an impact when they do. I suspect it would get to me if it became an ongoing thing, though!
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