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Christi Diggs
on May 23 2013 - 06:00 AM
A drop of spin, a cup of deception and tsp. politics=Apathy
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Lindsay Metcalf
on May 22 2013 - 06:00 AM
When that tornado siren sounds, I'm in the basement
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mara williams
on May 21 2013 - 06:00 AM
Summer break has this mom on a house upkeep war path.
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I remember the days when my oldest had such easy questions.
Where does rain come from? Where does God live? No problem, I had those covered. I also had little trouble with where babies came from - though his eyes did bug out a bit as I gave a brief description.
As someone who makes a living asking questions, I say ask as many as you want, any time to anyone. And as moms, we all know that questions are crucial; it’s how kids learn, so bring ‘em on.
But am I the only one who thinks these questions are getting harder and harder every year? Anyone else sometimes find themselves stumped for an answer and feeling like an idiot?
Thing is, I want to be that mom who answers all her son’s questions with such candor and intelligence that he not only remembers what I say but can pass on that knowledge some day. Yeah right. I guess I just want to be able to hold my own against my fifth-grader.
Sometimes, I succeed, like the easy question he asked on a recent trip to Target: “Is someone who doesn’t believe in God called an enthusiast?
But how quickly we can fall. “Why doesn’t the moon have an atmosphere?”
Uh, what?
“You know, why doesn’t the moon have an atmosphere?” He went on to talk about nitrogen and oxygen and what makes the sky blue and then something about the rings of Saturn and well … he lost me at nitrogen.
Then there was the question this weekend, in the car as we drove down to the Ozarks.
“Is being pregnant like having worms?” which prompted me to glance over at my husband for some support. “When you’re pregnant and you eat, the baby is eating your food and when you have worms, the worm eats your food too.”
And to think I had somehow failed to see the connection. So I stuck to what I knew, offering a few things about nutrients and about how babies thrive on what their mothers eat.
“So why can people starve when they have worms, but don’t when they’re pregnant? And I heard that worms can go up and eat your brain.”
Time to change the subject.
I’ve realized what we say is forever cemented in their heads. My son listens to our answers, processes them and then puts his own little twist on it.
The other day he came home a little agitated with an accusatory tone. “How come you never told me President Bush started the war?”
So we talked about politics for awhile, me and this kid who for years would get on to people if they said anything bad about Bush. He asked about the people running for president and what they thought. We ended the conversation with my son saying he didn’t like the president anymore and then moving on to play video games.
This pretty much settled everything political until the other night when we changed the TV channel to hear the latest South Carolina and Nevada election updates. McCain was ahead of Huckabee. This didn’t bother him, and he kept reading his Pokemon book (my son, not Huckabee). Then Keith Olbermann reported Clinton was beating Obama.
“Man, that’s not fair,” my son said, looking up from his book. “Obama has the more better plan.”
Now that I know he’s listening, actually listening to us, I hope we answered that worm and baby question correctly.
PLEASE don't tell me it gets harder! I was hoping that logic would step in and it would be ok if Mom or Dad didn't know an answer. Right now, I'm supposed to know, apparently, and even if I do, neither the 7 yr old nor the 4 yr old will stop long enough to listen. The worms like pregnancy thought is brilliant-- what a great connection to make! My pat answers either start with, "Well, SOME people think..." or, "I don't know. Why don't we go look that up on the computer?" Unfortunately we rarely look anything up, but I hope that gets better as they get older.My oldest loves history, and my history education wasn't too good. So he'll ask something like, "Why shouldn't you fight a land war in Asia?" or "How did the U.S. get involved in Vietnam?" For a while, I tried to explain but doubted the veracity of what I was saying. But my mom taught history, so now I send him over to her. Or I buy him books or take him to the library and let him figure out the answer. He knows a lot about the Civil War, for example. Last year we were visiting the battlefield at Antietam, and I made a comment about one of the generals. He told me I was wrong, and we argued a little. When we got back to our hotel room, I got this book on Antietam that I'd given him and looked up the general, and darned if the kid wasn't right. Sometimes when he starts asking questions, I get a panicky feeling inside.The best parenting advice I ever got was from a girlfriend who is also a teacher. When your little darling asks a question that you are not sure how to respond to, or you want a little more time to process the question -- simply reply "That's a great question, what do YOU think?" I have gotten some of the most interesting responses to that one! =) Once they start talking, you have a better idea of what they are actually after -- and it isn't always what it seems with that first blurt. This still works with my 6 year old, my 8 year old, and interestly enough -- my spouse. =)I can relate to the moon/atmosphere question. My DS mostly reads nonfiction books, so he has a lot of information stored in his brain...I don't know half the stuff he knows! He's in 5th grade and sometimes it takes a concerted effort for DH and I to check DS's homework and see if he did it right! lol And, sometimes we are wrong! I don't know if I should laugh or cry at that last part :)
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