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Lindsay Metcalf
on Jun 19 2013 - 06:00 AM
My top five most important moments of the summer so far
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mara williams
on Jun 18 2013 - 06:00 AM
Hey, manchild, mama says: clean your room, wash the dishes, don't drink and drive.
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Emily Parnell
on Jun 16 2013 - 06:00 AM
Eating fresh, local produce is good for body and soul
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Jim Cosgrove
on Jun 13 2013 - 06:00 AM
I just want to buy some pants. Please, turn down the music.
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Not me and my husband. We’re OK there.
No, we need it for oldest. Seems he’s lacking a little.
Or he just hasn’t found it yet.
Not for academics. Not for things like biking or hiking or running. Not even for athletics.
His excitement level has increased over the years, which is a good thing. But he doesn’t have that all out passion for anything. That must-do-it-or-I-will die kind of passion.
And believe me we’ve tried just about everything. Especially sports.
Soccer. Baseball. Basketball. Football. Track. All but Water Polo, it seems.
It’s like he’s been shopping around for some passion.
From age four on, he’s gone from OK to good to pretty good in some sports. He aims for average to a little bit above and hits it every time. Except for when he was five and found soccer so exciting that he’d rather play in the porta-potty. Or pick flowers at one end of the field while his team was at the opposite side.
I’d be OK with average to a little bit above if he were. But he wants to knock it out of the park with something. Hence the shopping for passion.
I fear he’s about shopped out.
“I just don’t have it,” he told me the other day. “Maybe I was born without passion.”
Each new thing, he thinks will be that one thing that really gets him going.
Something where we’ll see that spark in him. That desire to be the best at it.
Whether or not he ends up being that, doesn’t matter. It’s just the wanting.
Am I crazy? Do kids have to have some passion at 13?
I see kids who go nuts at football. Who run out on the field and pump their fits like Brett Favre or do a little smack talk like Ray Lewis. They're not the best on the field but you can tell football is their thing.
Or, you see the kids in the geography bee. Name a country and they’ll tell you where it is. And they’re loving every minute of it.
Artists? They’ll draw for hours. And not even for a grade.
Readers? Heck, my son has a good friend who would read through a rock concert he loves it so much.
Again, my son likes all those things OK. But doesn’t LOVE any of them.
Could we have finally found HIS thing? Cross your fingers everybody.
For a couple years now he’s told me that drama may be his thing. Ever since he was five or six he’s wanted to be a little actor.
And how many drama camps have I taken him to? Plays?
Wait, this isn’t about mom guilt, it’s about passion, right?
Well he’s finally in drama club in school. And working on a play, getting to school four days a week at 6:45 a.m. and not minding it. Yep, we could have passion here.
I don’t want him to be the lead. Just stand on stage with passion. Show a little bit of a spark, like, ‘Yeah, I’m lovin’ this.’
We'll see how it goes. If it doesn't pan out I guess there’s always water polo.
I think Oprah has put too much into finding a passion. Some people are well rounded and enjoy many different things but don't go crazy for any one thing. I truly find these people more interesting. Expose him to a little of everything and he can go anywhere and fit in everywhere.I was thinking about this the other night after watching an unbelievable guitarist. He started at age 4 and was in a family band. They didn't even go to school. So I got to wondering if everyone has the ability to excel like that at something. I think maybe not. And I think that's ok. I know lots of adults who are 30 something or older, and just now finding their passions. And I guess some people never do. But if there's one thing I've realized, you really can't force passion!You're doing a great job of letting him try different things. I'm not there yet. If my kids don't beg to do it, it ain't happenin' yet. You have committed much time and energy to allowing your son to sample many things. I think I'm in agreement with jnsnflwr and emily--not everyone is driven by an activity so much that they can't be stopped. I have always thought of myself as somewhat passionless, but when I read what they wrote, I find myself a bit there. I'm good at several things, not great at any of them. But I have a well-rounded life. Maybe that IS my passion--a bit of all of it? Maybe that's your son. Or maybe he'll like drama for a few years, and then he'll like something else. Can't wait to see what happens in this story!Theater could be his thing. I have the same challenge with my 14-year-old son. He's an amazing artist. I wanted to take one of is designs and put it on some t-shirts and sell them. He shrugged his shoulders at the exciting prospect of making some money selling his designs. It will click. I didn't know that mine was writing until I was in college. Give him time and lots of opportunities, which it sounds like you're doing.
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