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At our house, we call it "Operation Make Friends."
And what it means is I’ve become obsessed with meeting people in our neighborhood, combing the small park just a couple of streets over and walking to the school and hanging out at the playground. The kids play, husband shoots baskets and I try to put on a friendly charm.
If there’s a mom with some kids, watch out. I’m going in.
You see, I’m looking for friends, hence the name of the Operation. They need to be young, like to play outside, maybe eat a few cookies and know a thing or two about dinosaurs.
I’m not looking for me, but our youngest.
He turns three on Friday. And no lie, he doesn’t have any friends his age. Never has. No play dates. No cousins, just big brother. No kids in the neighborhood his age he knows. We’re fortunate he can stay at home with my husband , but - aside from a few trips to the park with dad - he’s never truly played with anyone his age.
When it came to planning his party he explained he wanted "all of my people" there. That means us, Grandma and Grandpa, aunts and uncles. Very cute.
All my friends with kids, have older ones. All of the moms I’ve met from the school where oldest goes, stopped having kids years and years ago. No one for youngest to play with.
So therein lies my guilt.
When oldest was his age, he went to an in-home daycare at a relative’s house and hung out with three or four little kids a day. From age one to five, these kids were at every birthday party and celebrated every holiday with him. They were a group.
Because of all that, oldest has always been pretty social.
But youngest doesn’t have a group, and it’s killing me. You can tell he loves other kids, going up to them at the park and standing near them, always the first to give a hearty, "Hi."
One day my husband took him to a nearby playground and youngest started talking to a little girl, introducing his daddy to her. She said something back, indicating her dad was playing baseball nearby.
Youngest was ecstatic.
"Dada, she talked."
Before they left the playground, he asked the little girl if she could go play at his house.
So now I’m determined. To find our little guy some friends.
But it’s not easy. I’m not one of those women who loves hanging out with mom groups. I’m more of a homebody who loves to hang out with her family. Plus, I have such great girlfriends I’ve always thought I didn’t need anymore.
Now, though, in the name of our toddler, I’m definitely shopping for some. Too bad there’s not a Match.com for parents, or even kids.
Instead, I’ll keep hanging out at our neighborhoods parks. If you happen to be in the neighborhood, I’ll be the eager mom, the one chatting up anybody that makes the mistake of making eye contact with me. If they have a kid around three, it’s a safe bet I’ll be going home with a phone number.
Crazy what we’ll do for our kids, huh?
I'm in the same boat as you. I'm SAHM and we only have one car. So my kids and I don't get out much. The nearest park is too far away to walk too. All of the play dates I know of happen during the day. So therefore my kids have no interaction with other kids. I hate it because like you son my kids are always hi everytime they see kids. I feel so bad for them but not sure what else to do for them..Good blog. DS was in daycare for the first year of his life, and now that I am a SAHM, I actually feel guilty that he doesn't get enough interaction with other kids. I am naturally shy, so it's hard for me to make new friends that have kids for him to play with. And it's just gotten worse since DD came along this summer. I have high hopes for his CDO this fall. I hope he will get something out of it other than separation anxiety...I hope you find me. I've been in the similar situation. It was sad to know that my son just turned 3 and had no real friends show up, just family, for his birthday party. He does go to daycare but because we do not take our kid to daycare in the same town we live in it's hard to meet outside of daycare.I also have the same problem we just to moved here and i'm a SAHM with a 2 1/2 yr old and a newborn, but he always wants to play with the kids next door but they are to old and it breaks my heart when were outside playing and he wants to play with them so bad! So anytime you want to meet up for a playdate let me know i'm willing to meet up for him.Same position here. We have a knack for picking out neighorhoods w/o kids. We tried a moms group for a while, but I didn't feel like I meshed w/ them well. I was at least 5 years older (some 15+ yrs)9 kids, about to become a grandma. Just didn't feel like a good match. My one turns 4 on Saturday, and she doesn't have any friends either. (or the 2.5 yr or 20 month olds). Saving grace is our large family.I can't promote joining some kind of preschool mother's club to meet other kids his age - and you'll meet friends too! There's MOPS, MOMS Club, and a host of others. Look at kckidsfun.com under parenting or playgroups for listings. Their not hard to find, cheap & WORTH IT. If you're stuck at home you can sign-up to host playdates for certain ages at your home. Moms will come with their kids - they wanna get outta the house too ;o) There's also lots of these type groups for dad's at home.Hi! Wow! It sounds like almost ALL of us that have posted have the SAME PROBLEM! My oldest is 3 and newborn all at home. Somebody leave a post, let's get together! -We're all in KC, right? How about Macken Park it's near or in, North Kansas City. Large park, lots of shade. I want to meet moms too! Leave a post of a good date and time and LET'S GET TOGETHER!!I also don't like play groups and mom groups much. I did join La Leche League and had fantastic mom support when my oldest was 2 and my youngest was born. But it's not for everyone, and as Stingyhag said, some local groups don't mesh with every mom. I liked story time at the library (little interaction, but enough of a dose,) and Paradise Park in Lee's Summit (the Edutainment Center side is great for that age.) We'd also go to the big bookstores and hang out in the kid section. Sometimes the kids would play the train table with other kids there. Wonderscope Museum would have kids his age, too. I admire you pushing through your comfort zone to do what your son needs. I don't think I did that enough, but my kids seem to have turned out ok. Preschool helped (one started at 3 and one at 4.)
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