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If only it was our teen, maybe we wouldn’t seem so pathetic. But no, it was our toddler.
We were outsmarted by a 2 ½ year old. Let that soak in a minute.
Picture a nice spring night, warm enough to grill out and sit on the deck to eat. There the four of us were. Eating brats, tater tots and salad. Talking, having a great time.
Then toddler, who basically refuses to eat anything these days except peanut butter-and-jelly and grapes, decides he’s done. Time for his cookie. He must have one. Now.
And like any mother would do, as she’s staring down a half-eaten plate of food, I say he has to eat his dinner first. Then dessert.
If you have a toddler that understands time, and that one thing needs to come before another, let me know. Hell, don’t just let me know, give me a manual on how to do that.
At this point, I’m feeling OK, though. No fit, just silence. Until he walks inside. The rest of us are still eating on the deck.
“I’m going to shut the do-or,” youngest says.
And before I can jump up, the door shuts.
“I’m going to lock you out,” the lovely child says.
And by the time we realize what’s happening, by the time any of us can get up to turn the knob, a tiny hand has reached up and locked the dang door.
Maybe our first thought wasn’t that we’d been outsmarted. Maybe it was more along the lines of my God the toddler is in the house by himself and what if doesn’t remember how to unlock it, or doesn’t choose to.
Meanwhile, my husband thinks he can get the jump on him. Believing the basement door was open, he headed down the deck stairs to sneak in the basement door. His plan was to go in and scare him. Make him think twice about locking us out next time. Maybe not the best parenting, but I was all for it.
But of course it was locked, so husband shouted he was heading around to the front door and disappeared.
And this is where it gets good. Toddler, as if he’s finally decided on a way to use his newfound freedom, heads to the stove where the cookie sheet full of cookies he had begged mom to bake since she got home from work were sitting, still warm.
And as if in slow motion we watched as he grabbed one, smiling, and shoved it into his mouth. I’m sure for him a cookie had never tasted so good.
By this time husband has returned to the backyard declaring that all four doors to the inside are locked. No way in.
I can see youngest through the blinds. He’s going for another cookie. Still smiling.
Time for the charm.
Luring him to the door I say I can’t wait to get in. I want to see the cookie he’s eating. He looks at my face, sees a huge smile on my face.
I’m no dummy. If I acted like I was mad, let on that he was in trouble, heck, we’d still be outside on the deck.
And just like that, I outsmarted him. Take that. (Yes, I’m declaring victory over the toddler. But come on, I’m still reeling from the fact a 2 ½ year old locked his entire family out of the house. Don’t even get me started on the safety dangers there. No, I’ll just stay focused on the humiliation.)
Indeed, he unlocked the door. Daddy took away the half-eaten second cookie and little one went to his room.
I only wish I could say he learned his lesson about being sneaky and deceiving his parents.
Once he got out of his room that night, and I was preparing his room for bed, he goes down to “play” with daddy. He tells him he’ll play his video game with him. So he sits on his lap, and after awhile jumps down and starts piling up pillows around him.
Husband thinks it’s all cute and continues his boxing match, totally oblivious that the real reason toddler is piling pillows up around him is to block his view.
Within seconds, toddler is upstairs, grabbing yet another cookie.
Toddler, two. Daddy, zero.
(At least I’m tied with the little devil.)
That was funny! One tot locked me out once so we have a key hidden ( that only opens one door) and can be back inside dolling out punishment in seconds. Actually, I should say-- we WERE back inside dolling out punishment in seconds. Congrats on your victory.Oh my gosh so funny! Our kids know how to lock the back door, so I am always thinking that they are going to do that, but so far so good for us! We have touchpads for the garage door openers so we can always get in that way. What I am most scared of is DS that is almost 4 locking me out of the truck! He likes to play with the door locks and I just figure that he is going to lock me out one of these days!Wow, I was totally worried you were going to say the oven was on. What a relief. Hey, we got locked out of our house by a dog. So I think you're way smarter than we are!Way funny! He's one smart little toddler, to actually plan all that. Especially the pillows. I liked sahmiam43's key hiding idea. You're gonna need it. You know he'll try that again now that it was so successful! My kids have locked the bathroom doors, and I just reach up and get the little key thingy from the top of the door trim. They think I'm magic.Oh yes, child #7 did that to me. Twice. (I didn't learn the first time). Only problem locked me out w/ her 13 and 2 month old sisters in there. She has outgrown that, and now I'm waiting for the other two to start.DD did this to us when she was about 3yo. How embarrassing! We had to call the grandparents to come rescue us, since they all have a key to our house. Now we carry our keys with us whenever we're working in the yard. I don't trust anyone so I don't hide a spare key outside.Yes this was funny. Sorry but been there done that. I went to check the mail and my 1 and 1/2 year old daughter had locked me out. I had the window open. So I had to jump through the window to get back in the house. It was a mess. She was crying cuz she was scared. Luckily the window was open or i don`t know what I would have done. By the way my phone and keys were in the house learned my lesson. Ha!
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