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mara williams
on May 21 2013 - 06:00 AM
Summer break has this mom on a house upkeep war path.
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Just for the oldest, that is.
Though he’s had his doubts for years - and he may have just been trying to appease his mom, who is as hokey as they come when it comes to the topic of “Christmas spirit” - this is the first year he knows that Santa’s not going to come crawling under the tree or eating the cookies on the table.
He’s none too happy about it either.
It’s almost like a little of his joy has been sucked right out of him. Used to be, he’d be counting down to Christmas starting back in September. He’d have his list all made out, nothing too big or small spared. Santa had options. What Santa didn’t get, the family pretty much did.
A little spoiled? Maybe. But always gracious and appreciative.
This year, he grumbled at neighbors who already had their lights up. He questioned very loudly stores having Christmas lights up before Halloween. He doesn’t even know for sure what he wants.
Seems the Grinch is living in our basement bedroom.
So tonight we have a little talk (no discussion left undiscussed at this house…). He assures me that he’s still excited and he’s very much looking forward to Christmas, and he said it pretty much like that, no exclamation points or anything. We discuss what Christmas is truly about (Jesus’s birthday). And I tell him you can still believe in the idea of Santa even when you know who‘s really putting the gifts under the tree.
“I know,” he says. “Believe in the spirit of Santa, I gotcha.”
Still not a believer.
“Christmas can still be magical,” I insist, in a desperate mom kind of way.
Then he really nails me.
“How can magic come from somebody's wallet?”
Just as I start to stammer, I look over and he’s smiling like crazy. Just kidding, he says.
“Christmas is going to be great, mom. I can’t wait.”
I leave it there. And now I’m trying to come up with ways to make this Christmas “magical.” So magical he truly believes, at least for a day.
I think little brother will help in that, with this being the first Christmas he’s old enough to believe.
One kids stops believing just when the other one begins. I like that. And for both, mom better come up with some pretty good plans to satisfy them both.
And so I have to ask, any magical ideas out there? Any other kids have trouble that first year? I know some parents never start the whole Santa idea.
But for me, I love that oldest felt Christmas was magical. At least for 11 years.
Oh....I just hate that they have to grow up! It is exciting seeing what they will become but I wish we could shelter them from everything! You sound like a wonderful mom! The conversation you had with him touched my heart! My older children are 20 and 15. My dd still lives with us since she is going to college and works a full time job. Even though they don't believe in Santa anymore I still make them help put the cookies out and go to bed so Santa can come. They play along with me. In the morning their stockings are full and there is a present from "Santa" under the tree. The great thing is they pretend like it is from Santa but I get the credit for it! I have a 2 yo ds also so I think that helps. On Christmas morning I see the joy in their eyes come to life when they experience their brother's joy at what Santa brought him. The magic doesn't die, it just moves on.“How can magic come from somebody's wallet?” Oh my gosh, should have seen my jaw drop! At least he said kidding! *big sigh of relief* Hope that it works out great for you! Don't really have any ideas, my kids are 3 and 1 so I have a while to worry about it.This will be a magical year for us. My dd 3 finally gets the whole concept and I cant wait to see her big ol eyes as she stares at all the lights and decorations and of course the presents.We were never allowed to say we no longer believed in Santa... a tradition I've carried over into our family. Not like you'd be in trouble or anything, but if we said aloud we didn't believe, he stopped coming. Well, even a teenager can figure that one out -- keep your trap shut about it and you get that extra gift under the tree, even if you know it came from mom & dad instead of Santa. To this day, I've still never told my parents I don't believe. It's just an understood thing for us. Maybe you could "bring him in on the secret" to help him get some of the magic back...? In other words, maybe he can creep out of bed and sneak around helping you guys be Santa for your little one? C'mon, it's magical for Santa, too, don't you think? It might work. Poor guy, reality is so tough.DD doesn't beleive anymore either so, this year I am going to start a tradition where she has to follow a bunch of clues to get her really cool present. My Mom did that to us once and it was alot of fun!You have a very astute child there! Wow...time for him to start getting involved in some volunteer projects, if he doesn't already.We don't have Santa in our house so it's not an issue. I don't have a problem with the story of Santa, but that's it, just a story. My kids never believed in him.My oldest has known for a while about Santa and was cool with it. My youngest still does, of course. So, my oldest is now Santa and gets the cookies and milk and help with presents for little brother. He really likes it and is a great big bro and Santa. We believe in the spirit of Santa.We're in the same world Laura...of first year of knowing that there really IS a Santa. She lives in the same house, and cooks dinner every night, and can't wait until she can be up all night making a cool christmas for her kids....and then be so tired in the morning that she falls asleep, sitting up, smiling and with her eyes open under the tree with her kids. Why don't you have your oldest baby help with special effects for little baby. White cotton (not balls, but by the "wad) on a brick in the fireplace is great "beard".....big boot footprints around the tree and fireplace are good...a little gold dust around the fireplace and all over the tree...also good, and when Santa accidentally leaves his pipe, in a christmas bowl, on the little table, by the chair that was moved in front of the fireplace......it's a great story for next year when you leave it out for him with cookies, with a note saying that you saved it for him ALL YEAR, and hope he didn't miss it too bad. I used to do all that stuff for Sophia....but now the gifts are outta the bag, and they know that I love them so much...that I will do what I do because it makes me so happy, and there is always a present that "for REAL' didn't come from mom...so who DID it come from????Awesome swiss..you totally know how to make a magical Christmas!! You are showing the kid in you...we should all be so lucky!!Magical is reading "The Polar Express." I think Santa is jolly because he is the one giving not receiving, though not sure how to get kids to understand that concept.My oldest has known for a while but our deal is -if you spoil it for the little ones, that's his loss on gifts from "SANTA"As always, you ladies have wonderful ideas. I guess I hadn't thought about having oldest be "Santa's helper," he'll love it. And Swissmom, perfect ideas. I'll be swapping most of those, especially the pipe one. Both kids will love that. And can you believe I've never read "Polar Express?" I'll be getting that one. I'll let you know how the magic goes. ...Your son is amazing! I still remember my first Christmas in the know. My mom was great-- she let me get up and fill my little sister's stocking (only that first Christmas.) I thought I was so grown-up! I don't recall being sad, but I'm sure it was a little crushing. I'm with Jennifer Brown and others- let him in on the fun. And I'm also in agreement with Valeriepwp-- GREAT time to get involved in some sort of charity to transition into the deeper meaning of Christmas and feel the magic again. What an exciting time, having a child mature enough to see deeper into things. His critical thinking skills are what probably solved the Santa mystery, and they will serve him well the rest of his life.
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