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Christi Diggs
on Jun 20 2013 - 06:00 AM
In lieu of good taste, request people bring money
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Lindsay Metcalf
on Jun 19 2013 - 06:00 AM
My top five most important moments of the summer so far
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mara williams
on Jun 18 2013 - 06:00 AM
Hey, manchild, mama says: clean your room, wash the dishes, don't drink and drive.
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Emily Parnell
on Jun 16 2013 - 06:00 AM
Eating fresh, local produce is good for body and soul
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Jim Cosgrove
on Jun 13 2013 - 06:00 AM
I just want to buy some pants. Please, turn down the music.
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Typically I think his, “Yes, please,” or his “No, you can go ahead of me,” are just great. Perfect really. Other moms say he’s the kid they like to invite over because he’s, well, so polite. At school and at other people’s houses that’s exactly what I like to see.
But, maybe not so much on the football field.
There we were, on Heritage Park’s Field 5 playing a Shawnee Mission team and our boys were doing great. They were really clicking, all of them, on their last game. You could tell oldest was having fun and really had this whole defensive end position figured out. He was tackling when he could and covering his guy.
Until, that is, one of his team mates was heading for the same tackle. Oldest was a little closer, could have tackled the opponent before he broke off from the pack and scored.
But no, tackling right now, wouldn’t be the right thing to do, oldest thought. His team mate was going for it. He, too, was going strong.
So oldest just stopped, backed off the tackle.
(I actually said, ‘Huh?’ out loud.)
And as soon as his teammate tackled the guy, oldest was the first to slap him on the pads for a job well done.
I just looked at my sister and laughed. Part of me proud. Part of me thinking, ‘Are you suppose to be so polite in football?’
This is also the kid typically last in any line he’s in. No, go on ahead, he’ll say.
If there’s one piece of pizza left -- No, go ahead.
Love, love the politeness. Love that he doesn’t mind someone else having something instead of himself. But can’t there be a line, a very fine line, between being polite and kind and being passive? Getting the short end every time? Is it wrong to want to teach a little aggression?
Not the, ‘Hell no, I want the last piece.’ Or the, ‘No way, I want to be first.’ Just a little, ‘It’s OK if you want to go for it.’
What if he’s going for a job some day, and really, really wants it, but so does his close friend. I’m thinking oldest could be the guy who just doesn’t go for it.
He’s just the way.
And maybe I even like that.
But on the football field? We may want to work on that.
Oh, I know this trait well, Laura! Both my boys are pretty polite...It's hard to be told all your (young) life to be courteous and then drop it all on the sports field. However, I have discovered that hormones sometimes do their work as boys get older. The ol' testosterone starts kicking in & that aggressiveness takes over. (Then it's just a challenge to get them to switch over again to polite-mode once they're off the football field!) Could we confuse our boys any more??We're dealing with this a little, too. When do you call it "assertive" or "being a leader," and when do you call it "selfish" and "pushy?" If I can't see the line--and I'm 38-- how do I expect my kid to see it? But we still have to teach it. Let me know if you find a way, 'cause this is gonna be a hard one for me, too.When my son was in Junior High he went out for the football team. You'd think that at that age, being 6' tall and about 185 lbs he'd be a natural, but I've always said he's more of a lover than a fighter. He ended up playing on the "B" team because his heart just wasn't into it. One time he fell onto one of the opposing team's players and that kid got hurt. My son was upset that he hurt someone! Secretly I was thrilled that he actually did something (by the way, the other kid was just smashed, not hurt badly.) Long story short, he only played football in Junior High and now just enjoys watching KU, MU and the Chiefs (although that's another story!)
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