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Lindsay Metcalf
on Jun 19 2013 - 06:00 AM
My top five most important moments of the summer so far
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mara williams
on Jun 18 2013 - 06:00 AM
Hey, manchild, mama says: clean your room, wash the dishes, don't drink and drive.
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Emily Parnell
on Jun 16 2013 - 06:00 AM
Eating fresh, local produce is good for body and soul
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Jim Cosgrove
on Jun 13 2013 - 06:00 AM
I just want to buy some pants. Please, turn down the music.
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- kim nakahodo - Profile | Pictures | Blog
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Yes. This is my most frequently asked question. All. The. Time.
It usually starts when they ask how old Niko is. Why is it that as soon as someone hears that your child is over the age of one that you are automatically trying for another?
We will be trying for number two this summer/fall… but still. The whole concept is a bit weird to me.
(This is going to sound crazy, but I am waiting so I can try to avoid having a Tiger baby. Yes… from the Chinese zodiac. I have yet to meet a Tiger I get along with so I’m going to wait and try for a Rabbit.)
I often get asked if we have another boy if we would try again for a girl. It’s like another boy would be like getting a duplicate Happy Meal toy.
I would love it if my second child was a girl, but I’m not shooting the moon for one. I know WAY too many people who get caught up with this one. You can wind up having a basketball team if you are not careful!
I plan on having two children myself… if we feel there is a hole in our family, we will adopt the third.
There are many reasons for this – by the time we would have a third child I will be over 35 and I do worry about complications. Ovarian cancer runs wild in my family – my mom had a full hysterectomy by age 36 due to pre-cancer. Most of my aunts (5) have had their ovaries removed in their late 30’s/early 40’s.
I am also a BIG believer in adoption. Most of the important people in my life are adopted – it just kinda happened that way. All of my life I have been surrounded by people who I would not have known if not for the miracle of adoption.
It’s difficult trying to decide how many children to have. I would love to have a dozen, but I have to think about the quality of life I can give them. It’s a tough balancing act between the love of more children and the harsh reality of financing them.
I know lots of people who put off having children for financial reasons… but seriously, you will NEVER have enough money to afford kids. If you wait too long – you may look back with nothing but regret.
I guess you don’t really decide… I and my brother were “oops” kids. Sometimes fate decides for you!
How did/do you decide on how many? I would love to hear how you do it!!
We knew we wanted only two, so we carefully planned each one. DS was born in early March, and DH thought we should have the second one around the same time, but I balked. My brother's birthday was only four days after mine, and during my entire childhood I never once had my own birthday party; I had my first one when I was 18. Now, when you're 18 that's not such a big deal, but when you're 8, you WANT your own party and not the one you have to share with your little brother and all his creepy little friends. :) So timing is important, I think, no matter what the reason is. After DD was born, I made it abundantly clear to DH that one of us was going under the knife, and I didn't care which one. It helped that I had really uncomfortable pregnancies, although childbirth was a cake walk!DH and I knew we wanted more than one (I'm an only; he's 1 of 7). #1 came after a bit of work on creating him; #2 came just 16 months later (oops). We debated having more and decided not to - we were happy with our "set". Then #3 came along! Three has been great although it makes us a "large party" at restaurants and is an odd number for Disney rides, etc. but it sure is nice to see them all together! I highly recommend having more than one and the quicker you achieve it, the quicker you are done! Good luck! (I'm a Rabbit; #1 son is a Tiger - I know EXACTLY what you mean about that.) Regardless, have fun trying! ;)The day after I had number 2 I knew that I wanted number 3. Well, I got my wish and then one. So, we are definitely a large party wherever we go. But, I just love, love, love watching all my kids play together, giggle and love one another. And someday I'll have a ton of grands to dote on. :)How do I decide on how many? First, I want six children. Then I marry a man who wants no children. Then it turns out we're probably infertile, so it's a moot point. Then -- after almost 10 years of marriage -- we get pregnant. Then I go through menopause while nursing a baby. A number of years later, said baby tells me she doesn't want a little brother or sister. I tell her, "It's not a problem." Several years later, she tells me, "I wouldn't be mad at you, if you had another baby." Again I tell her, "It's not a problem." How do I decide on how many? Biology. I can't have another.I have the opposite problem. People ask me all the time if I am done, or "how many are you planning to have." Fact is, we haven't planned to have our children...except the one right after our 16 week fetal demise. We have just done the "take what you get and don't throw a fit" thing. And I laugh at the 3 being a large party...or even 4. We are going to have 7 this feb/march and that IS a large party in most places. Don't regret a single child no matter how much people seem to pity me.Well what I like to say is the Good Lord decided how many I should have.. Before my son I had two miscarriages. So I was beginning to be discouraged. Low and behold here comes my son. So I decided to play a joke on my dh and have the dr tell him @ my 6 wk checkup I was pregnant again. Well I shouldn't have done that because when my son just turned 4 mos old I found I was pregnant again.. So needless to say they are a year and 10 days apart. People still ask if I'm going to have more. Let me tell you my marriage would not have lasted another kid. I was B***h when I was pregnant and well kindof still am:)Unfortunately, the cost of a good early learning childcare place is extremely expensive. We waited until Bo was done there (They did an awesome job and I got what I paid for!!!) until we even put thought into another one. Kids are expensive, especially if you decided to send them to private school until the age of 18 like us. (That's how we were raised and that's how we'll raise ours). Now Bo is in school and... hey... you never know! But I do know we're stopping at 2. Not only can we not afford more than that, but I don't have a ton of patience either. ;)Well, I pretty much had all my kids by accident. But I weathered that "when are you going to have kids" question for a long time before the first one came. It hurt, too, because I'd had several miscarriages. So I started coming up with crazy answers, like, "Never" or "we're looking for a surrogate. Are you interested" so people would leave me alone. It's really no one's business and totally pisses me off when people ask. You don't know whether someone's having a hard time conceiving or has other issues to deal with. I think people should just mind their own business when it comes to whether someone is going to procreate.Ok so I was interested to see what my animal sign is for the chinese zodiac. Guess What I'm a Tiger.. And my husband is a rabbit.. Go Figure. Anyway I thought it was funny that in your blog you talked about not wanting a tiger and that's what I am.. It's funny because I think my animal sign fits me.. LoL..I don't mean anything by not wanting a Tiger at anyone directly! :) Perhaps we should meet up so I can have a Tiger I get along with! :)I know you wasn't making the comment toward any one direct person. I just thought it was funny you mention and as my luck goes that's what I am..
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