Raising children is like an exercise regiment; as long as you are working at it your making progress, and progress is slow. But as soon as you ease up you fall backwards, and the back slide is a heck of a lot faster than the progress ever was.

With kids, start early and it will stick they say. Don’t you believe it. That advice, in my opinion, is little more than bull dung - worthless.

The truth; Start early, stay on them, never let up and if you are lucky they might get it. OK, yes, that start early it will stick philosophy does work for some kids, some times. But trust me, you let up, they lose it, and you are starting all over. And each time around is harder than the time before.

What the heck am I talking about?

I started early training my boys to pick up after themselves. After play time I remember saying over and over again. Pick up your toys and put them away. That was a daily routine. It was rare, but sometimes, after I’d been telling them the same thing over and over again for, what seemed like forever at the time, they would actually pick up their toys and put them away without me ever having to tell them. I gave them praise, and lots of it. I think a couple of times I even celebrated quietly in my room praising myself for parental accomplishment. Victory! I was  patting myself on the back because I had taught them some lesson I was sure they would take with them for the rest of their life and it would serve them well.

As they got older, I added chores, routine chores. Remove your plate from the table after dinner, take out the trash, load the dishwasher. After your shower spray down the tiles, rinse the tub. You know, normal cleanliness stuff. I was raising my boys right. And I raised them both the same.

Even with my oldest, who is very particular and really neat and organized - he kept his room tidy and organized his clothes in the closet by color, hanging all the shirts together, all the pants together and so on. But when it came to house chores I found myself constantly reminding him when it was his turn to do dishes and his turn to take out the trash. If you see something on the floor, bend down and pick it up. Don’t leave your books on the kitchen table If you use a glass rinse it and stick it in the dishwasher. I know I told my youngest, starting when he was about 4, maybe sooner, after every meal, every day for at least 12 years, when you finish your meal, take your plate off the table and take it to the kitchen. I got so that when I saw him about to take his last bite of food I would say, don't forget to take your plate off the table when you are done. You would think that by the time they were in the mid teens I wouldn’t have to tell them these things any more.

And I come home from work, ready to get the dinner started and the sink is full of dishes, and there is stuff all over the counter. WHY?

I leave out of the house for work on garbage day and the trash bin hasn’t been pulled to the curb. WHY? Jordan is the only one home these days so that’s his chore. He has to walk right passed the trash bin on his way to the bus every morning. Plus, he passes a street full of trash cans at the curb as a reminder that it’s trash day. All he has to do is pull the darn thing to the curb. BUT NOOOO. When I come home the can is still at the curb. He passed it on his way to the front door. Cam inside and found something to eat and left the counters dirty and the sink full of dishes. I come home and yell about the mess. When I do he jumps right up and cleans it. But I have to stay on him and not let up.

I visited my eldest’s apartment at school. It was neat and clean. But when he’s home, dishes on the counter, sink full of dishes, step over stuff that’s fallen on the floor. I have to remind him. He does it right away but I HAVE TO REMIND HIM. WHEN DO THEY JUST GET IT?

It’s like working out and working out and waiting for results to show. If you give up you never get there. If you see some results and then let up you lose what you’ve accomplished.

So every day, I find myself, still after all these years, saying pickup after yourself. Take your plate off the table. Don’t leave coffee cups in your room or the family room or on the table. Rinse, put it in the dishwasher. Take out the trash. Bring in the trash bin. Hang up your clothes. Take your shoes to your room. Brnd down and pick up that piece of paper you just stepped over.

It’s crazy and I’m tired. But remember  you got to be tough, stay on them and never let up.  WHEN IS IT GOING TO STICK? Heck if I know.

I’m praying now that when they have kids of their own their kids will be as hard headed about this stuff as they were.

I just hope I’m around to enjoy that.