I was reading the comments from last week’s post - remember, son goes to Vegas comes home with cool tattoo. Folks wrote things like, you raised your kids right, so you don’t have to worry; they will do the right things, they remember what you taught them and yada, yada …

Well let me tell you, your children are keeping secrets from you. They have done things you won’t find out about until they are much older. Things that if you knew about them at the time, they would totally make your hair stand on end. I know this because Monday night I found out a few things my kids had been keeping from me for years.

We were having the traditional Memorial Day backyard barbeque at my house with friends. Burgers, hot dogs, slaw and grilled corn on the cob had just been eaten. A friend and I got to talking and laughing about things we had done when we were kids, and my two guys jumped into the conversation.

They began sharing stories about things that happened when they were young and they had all of us laughing talking about finding old food in their rooms or the time my youngest got into a file of very important documents including everyone’s birth certificates and some tax papers and dumped them all in the recycling bin. I’d like to say we caught them before they where dumped never to be seen again. But I’d be lying. I knew about all of those things. But then it happened.

Trey starts out with “Mom I never told you about this one.” My ears perk up instantly. He proceeds to tell me about one of his friends being called the N word in school and how that incident escalated until the school became divided in what the kids were calling - he holds up two fingers on each hand and makes the sign for quote marks - “The race war.” He said it got so bad that one day after school kids met at a park with one group on one side and another on the other, staring each other down. Then one kid throws a punch and the two groups clashed in a mass, fist flying brawl. I’m like, “Were you there?” Yes he was. “Were you fighting too?” At first he was just watching he said. But then some one hit him so he had to hit them back. “OMG! OMG! I can‘t believe you were in a fight. I didn‘t raise you like that. Don’t you know that any one of you guys could have gotten hurt. What if someone had over reacted and brought a weapon? You could have been wounded or ended up getting arrested for fighting and causing a public disturbance. It could have turned into a horrible situation.”

You know what he said? “I know. That’s why I never told you about it.”

That was secret number one. Next his brother tells me that when he was in elementary school there were a few kids bullying him. He said they would sit on him on the playground until he couldn’t breathe. He said they thought it was funny. That’s when my hair stood on end. “What?” “Why didn’t you tell me about that? Where were the teachers. How could they let that happen. If I knew about that I would have gone down to that school and raised holy hell.”

He said, “I know. That is why I didn’t tell you.” He said that now the kid who was the bully ring leader is a dork, who no one likes. And Jordan has a bunch of great friends he hangs with.

So you see what I mean. They are keeping secrets. I just wonder what other things they have done or have happened to them that I don’t know about. What else aren’t they telling me. For a while they were on a roll telling stories. As long as I was listening and laughing they kept talking. Then I blew it and made the mom mistake of asking, “What else happened over the years that you haven't told me? That’s when they stopped talking. I did learn something about my kids though. I mean, besides the fact that they have secrets from mom. They are lucky those things didn’t turn out badly and some day they will be able to sit around with old friends and have some stories to tell about crazy things they did when they were kids. Since they never got in trouble for anything, anything big that is, I thought they were missing out on those - remember when we did such and such moments that we all laugh about after we are grown. I guess I was wrong.