advertisement
-
Emily Parnell
on May 25 2013 - 06:00 AM
Do you want something great to happen? You better start doing something.
- read more
Christi Diggs
on May 23 2013 - 06:00 AM
A drop of spin, a cup of deception and tsp. politics=Apathy
- read more
Lindsay Metcalf
on May 22 2013 - 06:00 AM
When that tornado siren sounds, I'm in the basement
- read more
mara williams
on May 21 2013 - 06:00 AM
Summer break has this mom on a house upkeep war path.
- read more
-
New York voted to allow same sex marriage this week! As supporters of gay marriage, my husband and I were pretty excited about that. That now makes seven states that recognize gay marriage if you count D.C., and we all just think that's pretty wonderful. Even Marc.
We were talking about it the other day at our house since it's been in the news. "What are you guys talking about?" he asked. He asks that a lot.
"Well," I explained. "You know how Mitch and I fell in love with each other and then we decided to get married?"
"Yeah."
"That's allowed, because Mitch is a man and I'm a woman. But you know our friends Fred and Jay? They are in love, too, but are not allowed to get married because they are both men. But in New York, they just voted to allow two men to get married, or two women to get married."
That's how I explained it. I tried really hard not to inject any opinion into that. It's hard, because I have opinions. And he asked what we were talking about! What was I gonna do? Tell him it's grown-up talk, go run and play? How condescending would that have been?
Now, obviously, I would prefer if my own children agreed with me politically, but I understand that they have minds of their own. I do try very hard not to say "this is wrong" or "that is right", because I realize that wrong and right are subjective in cases like these. So I just explained it as best I could.
He asked me why two men can't get married if they love each other. "If two people love each other," he said after a brief period of thought. "They should get to be married. It shouldn't matter if they are boys or girls."
I smiled. "You think so?" I didn't want to confirm or deny his statement. Obviously his opinion has been influenced by my incessant feminism talk around the house and my constantly bringing him to all kinds of protests. But I felt like he came to this conclusion on his own, and I'm glad.
He's gonna be a liberal hippy activist, just like his mama!
We don't hold much back in this house. He knows what "lesbian", "gay", "bisexual", "transexual", and "queer" mean. He knows what a sex change operation is. He knows exactly how babies are made, gestated, and born. He's seen my breasts when I fed his baby sister.
Every time he says "what are you guys talking about?", we answer as honestly as possible.
Well, sure, I want him to form his own opinions and be his own man. I do. But I would be lying if I said I didn't influence those opinions. Any parent would, and I think it's impossible not to. I am glad when he talks about how boys can be cheerleaders if they want to and how girls should get to play football. I love it when he talks about social equality and how gay marriage is a no-brainer. I haven't talked to him about abortion yet because he hasn't asked. Do I want him to grow up to be pro-choice? Of course I do! I'm his mom and I want to pass my values on to my children!
But I won't hold back information. I give it freely and liberally. No, not THAT kind of liberally! Okay, well maybe a little. It's hard not to inject my own liberal opinion in my explanations of things. But I'm sure he'll grow up to be his own man. And when he does he'll be educated, and he won't be afraid to ask what other people are talkin' about!
I explain these things to my kids in an age appropriate manner. I do tell them my opinions on things, but I don't tell them who I vote for. My 15 year old responded with enthusiasm regarding the vote in NY and I think I am raising tolerant kids. I sure hope so. My kids and I don't agree on everything and hey, that is okay too! I grew up in a very politically divsive house and though it was a little tense at times, it taught me a lot. I also learned that as we grow older and our situations change, our political views and ideas can as well (as my parents have, they aren't quite as conservative as they used to be.)As I respect your opinion, I would like to share mine. As you stated it's hard not to inject your "own liberal opinion", I can't help but not to inject my conservative opinion. As we all have many beliefs/opinions, my beliefs are based on what I have learned reading my bible. Also, being Conservative does not make me intolerant. I believe a marriage is to be between a man and a women. This is what my bible teaches and this is what I will teach my children. If they choose not to believe in the sanctity of marriage when they are older-that is for them to decide, but for now I will teach my 6 year old, 5 year old and 1 year old that marriage is between a man and a women. Our situations and political views may change, but the word of God remains. As so many are standing up for what they believe in these days~I will take a stand for marriage!I think you did a good job. I won't post my side on this topic because of work ethics... but here is an interesting view of gay marriage on the Catholic side: http://www.catholic.com/library/gay_marriage.asp Again, don't assume I agree with all things Catholic, because I don't... but this is an interesting read if you have time.As a mom of an 18 year old gay son I think you know where I stand on this. I am happy that you are teaching your children tolerance and understanding. People don't choose to be gay or lesbian, they are born that way. I knew my son was gay when he was very little and I even told me sister that I wouldn't be surprised if he came to me one day and said, "Mom, I'm gay". Of course the way people are raised sways their opinions on certain subjects but I think each individual knows in their hearts how they feel about the subject, not matter what their parents teach or preach to them. I don't expect everyone to agree with me on this subject but please do keep an open mind. You don't know if your child will come to you one day and tell you he or she is gay. I hope to see my son get married some day and have children of his own. It's something every parent should be able to experience with their kids, not matter who they marry.
May 2013 Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 Tagsmotherhood (12)
school (10)
family (9)
parenting (7)
growing up (6)
fibromyalgia (5)
birthday (4)
bullies (4)
kids (4)
toddlers (4)
anxiety (3)
divorce (3)
normal (3)
stress (3)
video games (3)
accident (2)
awesome (2)
baseball (2)
brother (2)
children (2)
christmas (2)
chronic illness (2)
death (2)
er (2)
hair (2)
holidays (2)
life (2)
love (2)
money (2)
news (2)
nintendo (2)
obama (2)
presents (2)
recycling (2)
religion (2)
siblings (2)
sick (2)
son (2)
taxes (2)
tradition (2)
unemployment (2)
valentine (2)
writing (2)
9/11 (1)
acting (1)
adrenal insufficiency (1)
adult (1)
advice (1)
afentra (1)
affirmation (1)
alone (1)
american (1)
animal control (1)
animal rights (1)
april fools (1)
attacks (1)
aunt (1)
babies (1)
babysitting (1)
backyard (1)
bad day (1)
bedtime (1)
bin laden (1)
bionicle (1)
birth (1)
body (1)
bonding (1)
brothers (1)
busy mom (1)
calm (1)
car (1)
car theft (1)
car trouble (1)
carnival (1)
casey anthony (1)
caterpillars (1)
cel phone (1)
celebration (1)
celebrities (1)
changes (1)
charity (1)
chicken (1)
classroom (1)
cleanliness (1)
clothes (1)
clothing (1)
clutter (1)
co parenting (1)
co sleeping (1)
comicon (1)
community (1)
competition (1)
confession (1)
dad (1)
dating (1)
daughter (1)
dead animal (1)
deals (1)
debate (1)
debt (1)
decisions (1)
decorations (1)
depression (1)
diapers (1)
dinner (1)
disconnect (1)
diverticulitis (1)
doctor (1)
doctor who (1)
doctors (1)
dollhouse (1)
drama (1)
ds (1)
easter (1)
education (1)
election (1)
employment (1)
espresso (1)
facebook (1)
families (1)
family bed (1)
fantasy (1)
faq (1)
fat (1)
fears (1)
feminism (1)
fever (1)
fifth grade (1)
filing (1)
finances (1)
first (1)
friend (1)
fun (1)
gay (1)
gay marriage (1)
geek (1)
global (1)
goals (1)
god (1)
good moms (1)
goodbye (1)
grades (1)
graffiti (1)
gratitude (1)
groceries (1)
grown-up (1)
guns (1)
haircut (1)
halloween (1)
handmade (1)
happiness (1)
happy thoughts (1)
hard times (1)
hate (1)
high school (1)
hip (1)
holiday (1)
home (1)
home alone (1)
honesty (1)
hunger (1)
hurricane (1)
internet (1)
interviews (1)
jobs (1)
joke (1)
joplin (1)
judgement (1)
karma (1)
kcmo (1)
lake (1)
lawyers (1)
lgbtq (1)
liberal (1)
libya (1)
louisburg (1)
mini van (1)
miniature (1)
minimalism (1)
moderation (1)
momless (1)
montessori (1)
motehrhood (1)
museum (1)
nag (1)
nanowrimo (1)
neighbors (1)
new car (1)
new year (1)
new york (1)
newtown (1)
nothing (1)
novel (1)
obsession (1)
occupy wall street (1)
occupykc (1)
ogres (1)
older (1)
organizing (1)
ozarks (1)
paintball (1)
paranoia (1)
parking lot (1)
pasta (1)
peaceful (1)
pee (1)
pencils (1)
permission (1)
perspective (1)
persuasive (1)
politics (1)
positivity (1)
potty training (1)
poverty (1)
practical (1)
prayer (1)
president (1)
principles (1)
prison (1)
puberty (1)
public (1)
pumpkin patch (1)
questions (1)
raccoon (1)
radio (1)
rage (1)
rainbow (1)
real life (1)
recipe (1)
remembering (1)
renaissance festival (1)
resolutions (1)
restaurants (1)
roller coaster (1)
romney (1)
router (1)
royals (1)
sadness (1)
sahm (1)
salesmen (1)
sandwich (1)
sandy (1)
sauce (1)
self esteem (1)
serotonin (1)
sharing (1)
shooting (1)
shopping (1)
single (1)
sister (1)
sleep (1)
slumber party (1)
spaghetti (1)
sports (1)
spring (1)
spring break (1)
spying (1)
star trek (1)
star wars (1)
state fair (1)
storm (1)
style (1)
super mom (1)
superheroes (1)
tantrums (1)
teachers (1)
teaching (1)
teasing (1)
temperance (1)
ten (1)
texting (1)
thanksgiving (1)
threats (1)
three (1)
tiger mom (1)
time (1)
tired (1)
toddler (1)
tornado (1)
trash (1)
tv (1)
vacation (1)
vacuum cleaner (1)
video (1)
violin (1)
visit (1)
voting (1)
war (1)
warming (1)
wifi (1)
wohm (1)
women (1)
wow (1)
zelda (1)
zen (1)