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Christi Diggs
on May 23 2013 - 06:00 AM
A drop of spin, a cup of deception and tsp. politics=Apathy
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Lindsay Metcalf
on May 22 2013 - 06:00 AM
When that tornado siren sounds, I'm in the basement
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mara williams
on May 21 2013 - 06:00 AM
Summer break has this mom on a house upkeep war path.
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"Will you make me something to eat?" I ask my handsome husband as I stride in from work at nine in the evening.
"What do you want?" he asks me. "There's not much to eat."
I let out a frustrated sigh. Not much to eat, of course. I want to cry. Normally, I wouldn't cry at those words. I can't even say that I was that hungry. So, why am I so upset?
Take a journey with me back in time. Imagine a woman who got married too young and her subsequent separation from her then-husband. Imagine how she feels: alone, poor, trying to support herself and her young son on her meager salary. Child support goes solely to pay for child care. Groceries are hard to budget for, and she's starting to miss her car payments. One day, she picks up her mail and sees that she's pre-approved for a credit card! Sure, the interest is outrageous and the line of credit is low, but she figures she could use it to pay for groceries and then just make monthly payments on the card. I'm sure she... okay I know you know it's me... thought it was a good idea at the time.
One thing I learned from that experience is that if you can't afford to pay for groceries, you can't afford a credit card. I never could keep up with it.
I hid from the bill collectors for a while, and for a while I never heard a peep. It's not that I didn't want to pay my debt, it's that I literally didn't have the money to pay the debt. Every time money came in, it seemed to go out just as fast. I have priorities: food, shelter, utilities, car, etc. When it comes time to see how much I can give to this credit card bill (or the hospital bills I have, even), there really isn't any left.
Okay, okay. I don't have to buy a latte. I don't have to go out for lunch. I don't have to buy books when I can get them free from the library. Heck, I just bought a Nook. I'm human, and I make mistakes.
But I don't shop for clothes or anything else really, I don't buy make up, I don't buy food we won't eat, we don't have cable, and we pretty much own everything in our house outright (except for the house). Most of the time after bills are paid, we are done and broke.
So you can imagine my terror when I learn that our bank account is on hold because of a credit card debt from seven years ago. My name wasn't even Valorie Engholm back then! Our house is completely out of groceries, we have a mortgage payment coming up, and we're trying to budget so our balance doesn't slip below zero, then this happens.
Did you know that if you have judgement against you your debtor can just reach their hands into your account and take money? That's a hard lesson.
We've been on the phone with them since Saturday. We offered to settle for 50% of the $1000 I owe. We told them we could wire it to them today and it would all be taken care of. But it wasn't enough. They wanted 80%.
Guess what we don't have? 800 dollars.
So I offered to make monthly payments until the entire debt was paid, but could we please get this hold off of our account before our paychecks go through direct deposit? We have to buy groceries.
Oops. Never tell a bill collector you have money coming. Now they want the whole thing, and they want it right now. Groceries will have to wait, because the lawyers need their money more urgently than we need groceries.
Now, I understand that they deal with people regularly who owe debts and don't pay them, even when those people can. People skirt the debt, they lie and say they have no money, and they come up with dramatic stories. As for me, I know I owe this money, and I never said I didn't.
But what I don't understand is how unreasonable they can be. We offered them 50% of the debt and it would be taken care of this very moment. They said no. We offered to make monthly payments and they would get the entire amount owed them. They said no. I explained as peacefully as possible that a hold on our bank account is keeping us from buying groceries, and they said "well, you're the one that ran up this debt".
Yes. I know. Thank you for speaking with me in a tone of voice normally reserved for children.
I've never been that great with budgeting money, and I've made a lot of mistakes in life. I admit that. But I feel held over a barrel. Right now, this law firm (whom I refer to as "Wolfram and Hart", please comment if you get that reference because I wanna be your friend) has taken control of our money, our lives, and our thoughts. All for a measly $1000. Measly to them, but a lot for me.
It'll all be okay. We have an action plan. I've spoken with some experts on the subject (my dad) and we've laid it all out. I'm hoping by the end of the week this will all be over.
But in the meantime, there's not much to eat. Bananas are for the baby only. Fruity pebbles are for Marc only. Snacks are only for when we need them. Rice is on the menu for the next couple of weeks. And when we finally get this whole mess taken care of, I'm totally ordering us a big, fat, greasy pizza.
I am sorry Val. I have been there..but it was a defaulted student loan, frozen bank account and two paychecks that had been deposited before I even knew that it was frozen. Ugh! I remember feeling less than human, thanks to the way they talked to me. But we are human. It is so easy to get hooked up in the credit thing, especially when money is tight. Hugs to you!So sorry, hope everything gets taken care of soon! I rarely comment on here, but I just had to say I LOVED the Angel reference!I just don't get why they are making such a fuss over $1000. It must be the principle of the thing for them. I'll pay it, and I never intended not to. I just don't feel like they are justified in holding our basic needs hostage in order to get it. Oh, and ajohnson, I'm glad you got that reference! :)That's so tough! I agree with cnnplus5 to open a new account--fast. I listen to Dave Ramsey all the time (we're doing a slow, non-religious version of his program) and this comes up constantly. Debt collectors are relentless. You are a reasonable person and you expect to be able to reason with them, but you can't. You just can't. This, too, shall pass!Val, this again, was very well written. I feel your pain. We are being garnished by one place, being threatened with garnishment from two others. The bills just keep coming in, but with Shannon on short term disability, there isn't the money they are looking for. It's crazy. It definitely isn't a matter of not wanting to pay our bills. We created the debt, and we should take care of it, but we don't have the money. I'm so stressed out every day and I cringe when the phone rings or I get the mail. If I had extra money, I'd give it to you AND I'd pay off those bills. PS. Loved the Wolfram & Hart reference. I just watched the one today where the Beast's minions killed everyone at the law firm. Hello Zombies, lol.Okay, I never watched Angel or Buffy, so I had to Google Wolfram and Hart. Lol, that describes debt collectors to a T! They are nothing but relentless thugs, scum, one step below ambulance chasing lawyers, etc... My husband got fed up with dealing with them on his student loans. He's hung up on them and will only deal with them if they meet him on his terms. He learned to be assertive toward them real quick and get plans with them in written form.I honestly do not understand why they won't work with you. Mine do--and believe me, they're considerable! I got the Wolfram & Hart reference too, just fyi. :) Good luck--hope this gets worked out soon!Moose, these aren't just bill collectors. They're bill collecting lawyers! That's a whole different kind of evil.Open a new bank account in a different bank and change your direct deposit asap.Hang in there-it will get better!Val, I totally feel for you. I like the suggestion to open a different account, silly me hadn't even thought of it. I've got a debt w/ a utility company that's turned into a huge irritant. Last summer I was paying our high electric bills like usual and then our August or September bill came and it was just shy of $700. It didn't even upset me since I knew it couldn't be right. The whole summer was hot so why should our bill have more than doubled? I just figured it was a mistake when I called them. No such luck. They told me they had estimated our bill all summer and when they finally came out and read the meter, they found we'd be undercharged for months. When I told them I couldn't make that large of a payment in one month, they said we could go on evenpay. Sounded like a good plan to me and i started making my $225 monthly payments. Just last week I got a call saying they would shut our electricity off today if I didn't pay our balance which was still in the 500-600 range. I called the company and explained that since we're on evenpay, that must be a mistake. They said I paid my November bill late (days, not weeks or months) and so that voided the evenpay agreemnt. Uh, hello? 5 months ago and I'm just now hearing this? They said it was in one of my bills and in all honesty, I hadn't even been opening them since I knew what I owed each month and paid it online. That, obviously, was my error. I told them once again that there was no way I could pay that all off in one month and they said my only option is to go on some agreement with them in which I pay $330 a month for the next year since that's what they estimate my usage will be for a year plus factoring in the previous balance. My thinking is that they clearly sucked at estimating my usage before, why would it be better now? And i'm in this situation to begin with because they didn't come read the meter during the hottest months of the year. I asked what would happen if I paid off most or all of the balance in the next few months and the rep said they might renegotiate w/ me in a few months. MIGHT. So frustrating. We're 6 weeks away from paying off an orthodontist and a chunk of medical debt and now this. I don't even want to start thinking about coming up with the deductible for the new roof we're probably going to need after the monster hail storm. Can't win for losing sometimes.OMG, Val. I can relate. They can be awfully nasty too sometimes. But, like you, I don't understand why these folks won't let you pay it off. That just sucks. But, hang in there. When it's over, and it won't be that long, you'll feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off of you. I know I did.I'm glad you posted this Val. I can totally relate, and it is nice to be reminded that we all make mistakes! I hope you get it all straightened out soon. *hugs!*Uh, I totally got your Wolfram and Hart reference. And I have been in debt collection world myself.... a Sony Mastercard from years ago.....We're already friends, and I do get it. I get the collector thing, too. I made some big mistakes in college. It was rough, and they treat people... so badly! Especially people who don't check their mail very often. It's why I don't have any credit cards today, I hate the people associated with them. Chin up, and message me if you're in dire need of a pizza.
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